Mental Health
This is more than just a business to bring awareness.
Jon and Sheady started this organization because we share a passion for helping others. But it’s more than that. We want to help ourselves as well. Much like how the best addiction counselors are former addicts- we have and still do struggle with mental illness, PTSD, anxiety and depression. If we had it all together - we would be rich selling copies of books and manuals to tell others how to love their lives. That is not who we are and not how real life works.
Social media is filled with images of people living their best life. Advertisements of puppies and rainbows. And who doesn’t like a puppy in front of a rainbow!!! But the real world is behind that. Just off screen is a child lost from her mother. Or a homeless man struggling with sobriety. That puppy came from a shelter where it’s abusive parents abandoned it. That rainbow is the aftermath of a horrible tornado. We don’t live in a picture perfect world. We have struggles and strive to learn and to grow each day.
The founders of CMT struggle with combat related PTSD and anxiety. Jon left an abusive and controlling relationship and struggled with alcohol addiction which has had a negative impact on his children. Sheady has struggled with an eating disorder and abandonment issues her whole life. She left her son in an unhealthy home environment while she served her country overseas- only to be sexually assaulted and come home to her bank account wiped clean and a nasty divorce.
But we are all on a healing journey. We seek help from friends and community and faith and therapy and medication and doctors appointments. We struggle with bad knees and hearing loss and job changes and an inability to get through a single day without a mental breakdown!! We are in this together. With our family and all of you. We want to share the tools and resources we have gathered.
We want to show you that we care. We are here. And we won’t judge you- because we have been there. We are still there.
Let us help you on your journey to recovery and healing. We will listen. We will talk candidly. We will push ourselves to be open about our experiences so that we can learn from them. We will share our stories so that the traumatic impact lessens each time we tell it. We will laugh and cry together. We will scream and curse together. And together- we will conquer that mountain.
Self Care.
One of the best things we can do for ourselves is to realize that we need time for Self-Care. Self-care comes in many forms that most people take for granted. Brushing your teeth, putting on clean clothes and showering are all self-care things that most of us do every day. But when mental illness waves in- these habits get broken. It’s wise to create a self-care plan. Have these things written down so that when you are struggling you can look at your list and come up with a self-care activity to help you unwind. This step is not about understanding the WHY of your feelings. This step is simply a tool to put your care first above all else, so that you can keep on climbing. Some of my self-care plans are listed below:
Tell someone I appreciate them
Watch animal or funny people videos
Go for a walk listening to music
Listen to a podcast
Make comfort food - and then eat it without feeling guilty!
Sing
Go for a drive with no destination in mind
Ask for help when I need it
Exercise
Listen to music that either matches my current mood or reflects the mood I want to be in
Ask my partner or family to spend some quality time with me
Feel it. Define It.
Emotion Regulation Handouts are great tools that you can find on the internet. Sometimes we feel things and do not know what word to associate with that feeling. Or we think we know what feeling we are having and try to convey that, only to realize that we are really feeling something else entirely. Understanding what word is associated with your thoughts and feelings can help to uncover the What and the Why. This tool is also useful in helping to stop the reaction behaviors that come with these feelings.
5 . 4 . 3 . 2 . 1 .
Another great tool to help you stop a triggering event and bring your mind back to a safe space is to practice the 5.4.3.2.1. method.
When you are in the middle of a panic attack or feeling anxious- look around you. Find in your environment 5 things that you can see. Point to them. Find 4 things that you can touch. Touch them. Find 3 things that you can smell. Smell them individually. Find 2 things you can hear. Listen to them and try to drown out any other sound. Find 1 thing you can taste. Taste it. Find these things and focus on them. Describe the senses. This technique can help you to disassociate the negative feelings you are experiencing and bring your mind back to the present moment. I use this tool often and it takes practice. But it does help.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
Taking time to check in with your feelings and defining them can help you to understand if you are reacting with an emotional mind or a rational mind. We are all guilty of reacting to triggers. Often times being able to recognize what your triggers are is the hardest first step. Once you can identify what has caused you to have an emotional reaction, work on evaluating yourself and your responses. Try to identify if your response is an appropriate one and at an appropriate level. For example: When someone cuts you off in traffic you may shout a curse word and perform a brake check. If you can move on from that moment in time in a few minutes, you are using a rational mind. If that event causes you to have a headache and you are screaming at every driver on the road, driving recklessly and then yelling at the cashier at the gas station you stop at, you are reacting with an emotional mind.
Be kind to yourself- but check in. Take a moment to pause and think about the event. That small event does not warrant holding your attention for the next half-a-day. If your emotional responses to daily life events cause you significant stress, there is something deeper there. Take some self-care time to think about what underlying issue is causing your emotional response. The important piece to remember is to Be Kind to yourself. Let your thoughts flow on paper or in your head without judgement. Search for CBT worksheets to fill out if you have trouble uncovering your rational mind. You will use your emotional mind again and again- and that is OK. Growth is a continual process.
You Got This
Written by one of our Co-Founders and Co-Owners of Conquering Mountains Together.
Sheady Davis is a retired SFC Army Veteran of Operation Inherent Resolve. She served in the Army for 13 years and has worked in the Federal Civil Service for over 5 years. She currently works for Purdue University’s ROTC program.
You can find her book on Amazon or by clicking
If suicide ever crosses your mind- know that I would rather listen to your story than attend your funeral.
When you are stressed -
Activities such as Exercise, Laughter, or Creativity will complete the cycle so that you can come down from the anger and/or anxiety.
God, Grant me the Serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can and the wisdom to know the difference.
— Reinhold Niebuhr
When a triggering event happens- allow yourself time to deal with that event, independently from all other events. Process it. Then move past it. If you don’t allow yourself that time- you will carry that feeling the rest of the day.
Remember - Growing might feel like breaking at first.
Progress. Not Perfection.
“The hole never fills but new life will grow around it”. ~Betsy, And Just Like That
“You never move past it but you move forward”. Sarah Maupin, Anatomy of Murder Podcast
I had the absolute Pleasure of meeting this woman in Florida when I was getting my Service Dog from K9’s for Warriors (linked in our blessings page). Ann Marie is INCREDIBLE. Her life story, the services she provides, her insight on life. She is a multiple book published author, public speaker, life coach and survivor.
Please take a moment to view the many resources she has to help you climb your mental life mountains.
Whatever it is, the way you tell your story can make all the difference.
Art Therapy is a great tool to help heal from traumatic experiences. Art therapy can come in various forms. Publishing my book on my deployment experience was a form of art therapy. Painting, creating DIY (Do It Yourself) projects is another great tool. Since coming home from my deployment, I have painted several pictures by going to a craft store and buying cheap paint and canvas and painting at home. I have also gone to several Paint and Sip events with friends where an instructor guides you how to paint something better than a stick figure. I have painted my entire bathroom vanity and floor. I have stripped my shower doors and painted them. I have made three end tables and a couch out of old pallets. I have taken an old motorcycle tire to make a rolling ottoman. I tore out a cabinet and placed a butcher block on top for a mobile kitchen island. I completely tore apart the carburetor in my motorcycle to rebuild it.
All of these things are therapeutic, healthy and Cheap ways to deal with anxiety and depression. Find your outlet. Find your medium. Find your activity that helps you disconnect from the struggles you are facing and puts your mind in a brighter place. Remember - your art is for YOU. So make it. Display it. Be proud of what you do.
#poetry by boots: this was found on an electrical pole in Chicago, Illinois. I walked by and it caught my eye. You can do an internet search for her amazing artwork.
